29 October 2009

daughter and
mother the
same hard face


RBroeker said...

I like this scene a lot, but I can't find the key to this special way to break the lines. My first thought was: a two-liner without "the" ... But just the fity cents of a pupil ;-)

Best wishes

Sam!! said...

That's a fact...

Nice work!

Take care

Devika said...

My mother is too soft...so i have to think about this....the background that made this set so,

but i like it, David :)


Kristin Riggs said...

I like this...it makes me laugh a little because I'm a teacher and I'm always amused to meet the parents of my students. It's very interesting to meet the "trees" from which those little "apples" have fallen...helps to answer many questions!!! :)

Dalloway said...

what did you do??

Dave Serjeant said...

Thanks for the comments.

Ralf - it would possibly have worked as a one-liner, but it would have lost the rhythm I feel. Plus having three lines might imply that there was an invisible third person (trying not to make assumptions) - probably the cause of the hard face. I also quite like to finish unfinished lines - to split them up - it sometimes helps to pull it along.

Kristin - precisely! Funnily it was as they were leaving the school gates as I was heading back to my car after work.

Emma - I probably smiled at them. It often provokes that response.

John McDonald said...

well caught

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