Tulips and roses

My back’s a bit stiff
cos I slept funny.
Spent half the night
worrying 'bout money,
I overcooked my eggs
and I like ‘em runny

but you ain’t bothering me today.
No, you ain’t bothering me today.

My razor’s blunt
and it made me late.
I can’t seem to get
my sideburns straight.
Now every single traffic light
wants me to wait

but you ain’t bothering me today.
No, you ain’t bothering me today.

I have a day full of meetings
when I get to work.
An inbox full of emails
and the office berk. *
Sharing jokes with colleagues
is my only perk.

You ain’t bothering me, it’s safe to say.
No, you ain’t bothering me today.

Though I nearly fall asleep
in front of the telly
and it’s time to push a needle
into my belly,
you won’t get me down today.
Not on your nelly.

You still ain’t bothering me in any way.
No, you ain’t bothering me today.

Though I feel wobbly
and my vision’s screwed.
Though my legs hurt like crazy,
like they’re being chewed
and my nerves, stripped of myelin
are buzzing
crude…

…her smile sets me free
from any bad mood.

So there you go,
now you know,
you ain’t bothering me today.
No way.
Tulips and roses.
Multiple sclerosis.
You ain’t bothering me today

(* non UK: subst berk for jerk)